Saturday, March 17, 2012

Never-Ending Nightmare (Short Story)

Spencer Brokaw

The light appeared, but vanished as quickly as it came. Dave stood in the cave, waiting for something to come to him in his solitude. But nothing would, he was eternally alone. The light came at random, and from where Dave didn’t know. In fact, Dave didn’t even know where he was. The cave he knew, but it was as if he had been living in an alternate universe, stuck in the hangout from his childhood—the cave at Snow Peak. He was all alone, and it felt like he had been trapped for weeks. The “world” felt real, but he knew it couldn’t be. Dave thought he was dead, but something in his mind told him otherwise. What hope was there if he believed himself to be dead?

He went to the front of the cave, where he would enter as a child, but the entrance had been blocked off, and replaced with rock, and a large, golden plate that covered most of the rock. The plate had 2 holes on either side. Each was a different size. Dave grabbed his head in frustration, and yelled. The yell echoed, but faded away into the darkness. Dave turned from the entrance, and ran down one of the two passages. Both passages led deep into the cave, going deeper into the ground. Dave held his hand against the wall and moved slowly. The darkness consumed his vision, but his eyes had been used to the extreme darkness. His vision in the cave had been improving. Dave saw that the cave led into the ground at a steep slope. He sat down on the ground, and slowly pushed himself forward. He tumbled down and landed on his back. A thud echoed as he struggled to return to his feet. His clothes were ripped and dusty. His brown hair had turned to a shade of gray from being underground.

Up above him something sparkled. He gazed up at it. It was the brightest thing he’d ever seen. He tried to make his way towards it, but it was at least fifty feet up. Stone was sticking out of the wall, forming a ladder for Dave. He managed a foothold, and one rock at a time, he pulled himself up. He reached for another rock, when his foot slipped. He was dangling in the air, 30 feet up. He pulled his other arm up with as much force as possible. He regained his foothold and slowly moved up the rocks. He reached the top and saw a sparkle 30 feet away. There were stone indents on the ceiling that led to the sparkle. It seemed too easy, and Dave didn’t even know what he was trying to accomplish. He was trying his hardest for something that may or may not impact his “life.” What else did he have to accomplish in a dark cave with no one? He had nothing, absolutely nothing. Dave grabbed a stone indent, and moved about them like monkey bars. He reached the end and grabbed at the sparkling object. He snatched it and held it in his hand with a tight squeeze. When he opened his hand, he saw a jewel. He was so ecstatic he almost forgot to continue. The jewel was the same shape and size as one on the golden plate! He retraced his steps back to the entrance and thrust the jewel into the plate. He grabbed his head as the light returned.

His head ached and he fell to his knees. His legs were shaking uncontrollably. The light faded and he was in a car. Was he really in a car? He had escaped! He drove down the road, as rain poured onto the front of his car. He swerved as the front of a car came into view. The headlights flashed in his eyes, and he returned to the cave. It was all over in what seemed like a few seconds. Dave began down the other passage, hoping that another jewel would bring more answers. He crouched and made his way down another slope in the cave, more carefully than he had before. At the bottom, there were several stone walkways that formed a never ending staircase. Dave sped up it. He wound back up where he had started. He finally figured out that jumping from staircase to staircase would be necessary to reach the top. He walked up the first set of stairs and pulled himself up onto another. He made it to the top in no time. He now saw that there was an entrance into another room. More “monkey bars” were above him on the ceiling of the cave. He jumped and grabbed the stone. His hand was cut and bleeding. He could not feel the pain.

He ignored his hand and continued across the monkey bars until he reached the next room. Dave could see the jewel in the corner of the room, unguarded. He ran towards it. He fell backwards when a large cage had enclosed around the jewel. Dave yelled and kicked the ground. He tried approaching the jewel with less motion this time. Tip-toeing, Dave made his way to the jewel, and got out of the cage’s range. He dashed off with the jewel, and sure enough, the cage closed around emptiness. The cage had been motion activated to protect the jewel. The only part of the cave that was real was the entrance. Dave didn’t remember any passages from when he was a kid. His mind must have bended memory and imagination together, forming the place he was now. Dave exited and reached the never ending staircase, after using the “monkey bars” a final time. Dave ran up the inclined slope and made his way back to the entrance. He took a deep breath, and pushed the jewel into the plate with all his might. The light from earlier had returned and it flashed off. Another light, this one different than earlier, flicked on and almost blinded Dave. He was lying on a gurney-like bed and saw his sister across the room. She ran over to him with a tear in her eye, and hugged him. The hug became a squeeze, and she wasn’t ready to let go. Dave hugged her back, but was still confused. Was this real? Or was it just another dream? A doctor rushed into the room as his sister took a step back. She smiled.
“How do you feel?” the doctor asked.
“Fine. Where am I? What happened?”
“You’re in the hospital. You just came out of your coma. We never thought you’d wake.”
“What happened?”
“You were in a car crash; one that would be fatal to most. Your body is healing and you are hooked up to fluids. You have suffered severe burns and are looking at several more weeks in the hospital. I’m sorry.”
That was the end of the never ending nightmare Dave would come to know as a coma.


  1. Awesome story. Your writing is improving. I was hooked from the beginning and didn't see the twist at the end. I am still in awe of your writing because of your age. Keep it up. You have inspired several of my students to continue writing.

  2. Wow, you are really growing by leaps and bounds as a writer!

  3. Thank you! I am glad that it hooked you, I was really going for a hook with those first few sentences. I am glad your students write too, only good can come from that. Thanks for the comment!

  4. Thanks anonymous! I appreciate the comment :)

  5. Great story, Spencer! Very well written.

  6. Okay, love that you published a book at age 12! That is awesome! I write spy novels too and I'd love to have you on the blog for a guest post in May. I can't seem to find your email address anywhere. Email me at laurapauling at yahoo dot com if you're interested! And so I can send you the official invitation. :)

  7. Thank you for the offer, I would love to!

  8. For a while there I thought this was a true story. I was struck by your writing. Amazing! Good thing it's not a real-life story. car accident attorney

  9. It would suck if it was a real life story. Thanks for the comment!